Why vs. how

During visits with recruits and their parents, I am often asked a series of “why” questions that sometimes internally raise my blood pressure. Why don’t you have a track on campus? Why have you never had a track on campus? Why are there no plans for a track in the future? Along with my internal teeth gnashing, I have to employ an internal filter to avoid blurting out things that I should not. Like … how the HECK am I supposed to know! I’m the track coach! Of course I want a track on campus! Yeah. Well. Keeping my inner immature, adolescent teenage attitude at bay is most certainly the prudent course of action.

But hey, they are legitimate questions posed by genuinely earnest and interested prospective student-athletes and their parents, so I cannot nor should not be glib or dismissive in reply. The tack I have taken recently has been to give a mildly philosophical answer: My job is not to ask why, but rather to ask how. In other words, I could bang my head against the wall in frustration over the lack of facilities and other shortcomings with which we (and most track programs) must deal on a daily basis. However, as I like to tell my athletes, self-pity and its cousin, anger, are generally unproductive emotions. By switching the “why” to the “how” … we can be more proactive, positive, productive and eventually as successful as we can be.

Why don’t we have a track on campus? Answer a question with other questions: How do we work around this? How do we adapt? How, instead, do we focus on our strengths?

This why-versus-how concept can be an effective tool in other areas of our lives. We all have dealt with sudden, unexpected or devastating losses of various kinds – deaths, loss of job, loss of health, etc. We all have had to cope with accidents, mishaps, disappointments large and small; it’s called life. Inevitably, we ask why. Why did this happen to us, or to those we love? Sometimes we even ask God the “why” questions. It’s human nature; we’ve all done it. But again, if we can have the strength and mental fortitude to ask pertinent “how” questions, we can turn life’s potholes on its collective head. How do we honor the memories of those we have lost? How do we remain thankful for what we have rather than what we don’t? How do we make the best of our new realities? How can we strengthen our faith?

During the winter weeks and months around here, it’s a challenge to keep the “whys” at bay and switch them to “hows.” Among other things, weather conditions are our constant fixation. My phone just buzzed with a notification of snow squalls and dangerously cold temperatures later in the week. Why do we have to deal with this? Uh-uh. How are we going to deal with this? Sometimes, a simple and subtle change of words can make a simple and subtle change of attitude. And, in my opinion, that’s how we should attempt to roll on a daily basis.